About Jaime

 

Hi I’m Jaime, I’m a Marketing Consultant and Copywriter and I am a Rockstar.

Since my experience I learned I could survive anything and broke my limiting beliefs. Launched my career as a writer 2 weeks after the incident, created $135,000 in a single month a few years later, found my spiritual path, became a trained clairvoyant to heal self and others, rose to the top of my industry as writer for bestselling authors and speakers in personal development, traveled the world with no home base alone for two years (to face the fear and embrace a dream), wrote for my dream clients including Tony Robbins, I have finally found, and am now living my soul path of service… 7 years later.

 

My Story

At the age of 25 I was desperately seeking spiritual guidance and help becoming a successful entrepreneur. The two desires collided when I joined a secretive online community of 200 people led by an enigmatic and extra-secretive man who said he was enlightened and would help us succeed in business while awakening spiritually.

Over 6 months our group of 200 became a carefully culled cult of 20. Our leader seemed to know things about me I never told anyone, including night terrors where I woke up and felt I was being attacked by unseen entities. He told me I was in danger and needed to fly to Florida to train with him to learn how to protect myself. We’d also continue building the business our group was working on. Eventually I agreed and sold everything I owned, spending the last of my money on the flight out. While I was promised a salary, a vehicle and my own place to stay, when I arrived none of those things were present.

Instead he tossed me into a massive truck and drove me out into the swamps to a trailer park where he kept me in a trailer. It became the ritual to “make me face my original trauma of childhood molestation” through raping me each day.  He kept another woman in a nearby trailer that he’d coerced into a similar situation 11 years ago. 11 years! She escaped while he was busy keeping an eye on me. As he went ballistic searching for her, I tried to escape too. He caught me in the act, yet somehow instead of hurting me, he just let me go.

I was there three weeks. I’ve since learned he tracked her down and she has since vanished. Either she’s back in that trailer or she’s dead. I’m grateful my fate was different, but I also wish I’d been strong enough to call the authorities back then so they could have maybe found her.

My Healing Journey

We often think that rape happens when a man jumps out of the bushes or otherwise takes a woman by surprise. Yet more often than not, it is someone we know and we may quickly learn it is dangerous to fight back. And so we just try to survive it.

My healing journey was largely around forgiving myself for surviving it. For not fighting back more, for fearing his violent tendencies during those hellacious three weeks.

It took me 2 years to admit to myself what had really happened and that I needed to heal. He threatened to kill me if I ever told anyone and swore I’d somehow meet with an untimely death if I left or got away. So I struggled with severe panic attacks as I began telling others and attempting to heal.

My turning point was realizing I didn’t have the strength to heal for me – but if I could help other women heal such trauma, or prevent it from happening through education, inspiration and women’s empowerment… then whatever suffering I endured in facing the pain and healing it – would be worth it.

That was the beginning of finding my soul’s path in this life. And I can say now, 7 years later, that I am increasingly living that mission. Rape did not come to define my life. Rather my choice to ignite my inner Phoenix — to rebirth myself out of the ashes of that experience — has become my sense of self. And I’m standing tall in an open-hearted space of love. I no longer feel any shame.

But it took me 5 concentrated years of effort after that potent turning point. I chose to heal via a spiritual path, focusing on feeling my feelings, energy work to release stored trauma, and reclaiming my personal power. I felt I’d betrayed myself by ignoring the bad gut instincts I had about that man, so I focused on connecting with my intuition (and later with actual clairvoyant training) so I could trust myself to never make such a mistake again.

I read empowering books for women, the most transforming of which was Women Who Run With the Wolves by Clarissa Pinkola Estes. Eve Ensler’s poetry and works were also very helpful.

Another massive step was recognizing how much I loathed my body and, working with a transformational coach and healer, we dismantled my inner hatred and I reclaimed a deep self-love and delicious relationship with my wonderful feminine being.

I’ve also recently fully forgiven myself and that man.

I can honestly say that every joyous, wonderful, miraculous and soul fulfilling thing I have in my life is because of the healing journey I engaged after that life-altering trauma. It didn’t have to happen… it doesn’t make it okay that it happened… and yet I will never fear the unknown or the bad ever again.

Because healing from this has taught me that I can overcome anything. Opening the heart after such a catastrophe created a fierce love-warrior within me that is learning to love at a whole other level. I have learned through all this that when I dare to rise… I do. When I leap… I can fly.

And when I fall… bloody knees do heal.

In healing, we reclaim ownership of that part of ourselves. And we learn the joy and bliss of giving it freely to someone when we are ready, in a safe space of love.

“You are the only one who can heal you. Others will guide you and support you. But you have more power than you could imagine and it is the only power that is given you. That power is LOVE.”

 

To My Younger Self

t took me nearly 7 years to heal my rape experience. In that time, I’ve learned that one of the biggest struggles you might face is how to tell yourself what you most need to hear.

So please, let me say it for you. I’m speaking right to you, sweetie:

You are beautiful.

You are stronger than you think or maybe feel right now.

It wasn’t your fault. You did nothing wrong.

He was absolutely wrong for what he did, but forgiving him and yourself is the only thing that will set you free. It’s the only way to let go and it doesn’t mean what he did was okay.

That said… everything’s going to be okay now. It’s going to be okay. You’re going to be okay.

Remember to breathe. Just breathe.

Others won’t always understand. Some may even blame you. Know that their words, beliefs and accusations don’t need to be your own. Don’t adopt them, for they are not the truth. They are not your truth and no one can force you to make it your truth.

Sometimes we must first own our suffering and how much it hurts before we can own our power to heal and overcome it. Don’t be afraid to cry. It will feel as though it might consume you. But in reality you’re consuming cleansing waters that will wash away the pain so it’s gone for good.

Be vigilant in LOVING yourself. Even if… Even though… No Matter What.

You are a radiant, innocent, lovely woman. Have you asked yourself why you try so hard to convince yourself otherwise?

You have been forever changed by what has happened to you. The type of transformation this is however can be up to you. Choose to rise from your own ashes. You’re stronger than you think.

It gets easier. Promise.

The path to healing begins with loving yourself, because the pain came from discovering a way you weren’t loved, protected or honored. Don’t let that convince you to take your own love away from yourself.

You are the only one who can save you. You are the only one who can heal you. Others will guide you and support you. But you have more power than you could imagine and it is the only power that is given you. Please use it.

That power is LOVE.

You are supported ~ even when you can’t sense it. You are loved ~ even when you can’t feel it. You are beautiful ~ even if you can’t see it.

You will survive.

Love yourself and hold the devastated little girl within you… and eventually you will THRIVE.